STAY “GOOD BUSY” TO COPE
Kim Cardone provided this post. It is full of valuable advice about coping with anxiety, and offers many specific actions you can take to make life more enjoyable.
Confession time. I am an anxious person. When did this began you might ask? I’m guessing I came out of the womb anxious and have dealt with it ever since. Of course, a child’s anxiety is a bit different from an adult’s, but it is still the same in that you FEEL “anxious,” often and for no reason.
I remember talking with my Gram about this and she would say, “One secret to dealing with being anxious is to keep ‘good busy.’” To which I replied, “Well, is there a keeping ‘bad busy’?” And she replied, “There sure is. There sure is.”
She was a wise woman. To this day, I have tried very hard to keep “good busy”…and it does help. If I may offer some keeping “good busy” suggestions, it would be these:
—-Call family or friends. Or text family or friends….hear their loving voices or read their calm and rational texts. It does help.
—-Read a book, magazine, textbook, instruction manual, etc.
—-Volunteer. Where? Anywhere!!!! Help is needed everywhere and in every community.
—-Take up a hobby.
—-Go for a walk. Walk the dog…good for both of you.
—-Go to your place of worship.
—-Meditate. Exercise. Sing. Dance.
—-Watch a favorite TV show or movie. Mine are always comedies or rom-com’s. They take me to my happy place.
—-Enjoy a good meal or a good snack or a good glass of vino or a favorite beverage. Key word is ENJOY.
—-And finally, breathe. Just breathe.
We may have been “born alone” but we are not alone. Not truly. Look around; there are lots of us on this planet, all shapes and sizes and colors and creeds and orientations. Reach out. Being an anxious person is no fun, I will freely admit to that. But dealing with being an anxious person has made me so very grateful for every good person who has ever helped me along the way and for every good thing in my life that has happened in spite of being so very anxious. To that end, thank you to all of my many support systems. You rock!!!
Remember, keep “good busy.” Even if you are not an anxious person, keeping ”good busy” will help you cope on so many levels and at so many points in your daily life.
2 thoughts on “”
Thank you for this advice Kim! Anxiety is certainly no fun. My grandmother struggled with it frequently and I would ask her what was wrong, why was she anxious? and her reply: I don’t know why, I just am. I understand now that at the end of her life (after losing her husband, her friends, her lifestyle), she did not have enough ‘good busy’ to distract her from how she felt.
I really like the wise distinction between “good busy” and “bad busy”. There is power to thinking like this and defining those roles. For one, I like to think of “good busy” as giving the fulfillment of esteem, connection, and direction. The “bad busy” is often more so just distraction but doesn’t give back a great deal to the person. This “bad busy” can also provide more strain and inner tension to the person ultimately…and in ways backfire from what the person is truly looking for. “Bad busy” is like spinning wheels in sand, the power gets to the wheels but the vehicle doesn’t go anywhere. Brian Cook, MS, NCC, LPC