Do you have a friend or family member who has little interest in the rights and feelings of others; has no obvious values, standards, or moral compass that guide actions; regularly manipulates, deceives, and takes advantage of others for personal gain; feels no remorse when actions bring discomfort to others; is impulsive and reckless with minimal regard for the consequences of unlawful behavior; is prone to substance abuse and addiction. This profile is typical of those with Antisocial Personality Disorder. They are the “black sheep” in the family. They can be very charming and witty, but also quite skillful at manipulating others to satisfy their own needs and goals, usually at the expense of someone else’s welfare. Not surprisingly, they are not very good at maintaining stable relationships. Others are simply there to be used and then tossed aside. In everyday conversation we often refer to these people as “sociopaths” or “psychopaths,” and, in fact, these conditions would be included in a formal definition of the antisocial personality.
Antisocial tendencies can appear in childhood. The path to this personality disorder results in kids who are mostly unresponsive to threats of punishment, and don’t seem to be bothered much by typical childhood stressors, such as peer pressure, bullies, or rules at home and school. The deception, disregard for others, and failure to conform to social rules seen in adult antisocial disorder is already present when they are children. Children who manifest the antisocial patterns are at the opposite end of the anxiety scale from children who are shy, inhibited, fearful, reactive to stressors, and motivated to follow rules. These anxiety-dominated kids are “marinated in guilt,” whereas the antisocial kids are largely immune from remorse and conscience.
Can the antisocial personality be helped? The challenges here are daunting. Counseling—talk therapy—methods are generally based on helping clients deal with their stress, anxiety, and avoidance tendencies. For the most part, these are not concerns for antisocial people; they do not suffer from stress and anxiety, are not afflicted with guilt issues, and have a “who cares” attitude when actions (robbing a store) are likely to result in punishment (jail). In short, there is little for a counselor to work with.
There is evidence showing a genetic basis to the antisocial personality disorder, a basis that manifests its effects on the prefrontal cortex of the brain. This area has been called the executive center of the brain, and is what gives us humans higher-level cognitive characteristics like judgment and morality. Genetics may also be expressed in the reactivity of the nervous system. For instance, if you’re born with an over-reactive nervous system—highly sensitive to pain and threats of pain—you will likely be prone to anxiety and seek to avoid stressful situations and obey rules. If, however, you have a highly under-reactive nervous system, you are at risk for antisocial personality disorder because you don’t feel much pain and need to find extreme activities to generate interest. At Halloween, the former kid will get a rush by going trick-or-treating; the latter kid will only get a rush by vandalizing porches and stealing from other kids while trick-or-treating.
Family and friends face considerable hurdles when trying to help the antisocial personality, whether a child or an adult. One thing for sure: reasoning with them, appealing to their sense of fair play, threatening them with punishment, and reminding them that you are always there for them…these strategies that work so well with those who have feelings and empathy for others, are unlikely to be successful with antisocial personalities. In fact, they are likely to see you as weak and vulnerable to manipulation, and be encouraged to distract you with their charm.
Psychology and Stress 